Saturday, October 22, 2011

[FP] Guy friends.



I think it's easier to hang out with guys. There's no drama. With girls, there always drama. Always some type of drama. Every time I with my girl friends, I get annoyed so easily. I try not to but some times I just have to walk away. There's the one who only thinks about her looks. The one who doesn't give two fucks about school. There's the one who hates on everybody and everything. Then there's the one who doesn’t like somebody in the group so they just don't talk at all and makes it awkward.


When I’m with my guy friends all we do is have a good time.
I do have girl friends that I’m always with. I’m with them because I can relate to them. I don’t have to worry about anything that’s what I like the most. I can't trust a lot of people. So it takes a while for me to get close to somebody, especially girls. I have like only three girl friends I can talk to with out getting stabbed in the back. Its sad. Only three. But its better that way I guess. 


I prefer hanging out with guys, some are funny. At least most of the guys I hang out with are. And I like to laugh so its perfect. Its better then having to hear about some girl talk about how fake girls are. Then I’m really thinking wow this girls fake by saying she's fake. Its so complicated I’d rather stay out of it all together. 

[FP] Dilemma .


My dilemma has always been taking risk or relying on fait. I go more for fait because everything happens for a reason. You cant fight fait either. If something happens its for a reason. Only god knows the reason. I always ask myself if I should just do this or something. I will over think it so much I end up not doing it and just see what happens. So far fait hasn’t let me down. Its been hard waiting for something to happen though. But I have to remind my it takes time for something to happen. Relying on fait means patients you have to wait and see what happens. I do what feels right too. I do what my heart tells me. Weather it’s not knowing what the answer is on the test or going up to the boy you like. If it feels right to ask this person something or talk to this person or to do something. In the end something happens.


There have been times where I play it safe and then wish I would have gone with choice number two but then the next time I know just to go with my gut. I take risk too like trying new things but then if its like something that involves somebody (like a boy) I just stay with relying on fait. When it comes to me, I kind of let things be. See what happens. Just go with the flow. Something good always comes out of either of the two. Its all about fait and letting it take its course my life.

[RP] Be you .

I had a female friend last year , and all she wanted was attention from boys. The way she walk , talk , act , dress , etc. And yes , she got a lot of attention . -Vincent



I have a friend this year, that all she care's about is her looks. I get so annoyed whenever I‘m with her. If we see a boy coming up to pass us, she checks her self first. Its like she has to. she is always stressing on what to wear, if her make up looks good, if her hair is looking good. Its like every time we hang out all she care’s about is her looks. Why can’t we just have fun like we use to. 


A guy should like you for who you are. From what I’ve heard from guys, they don’t even really like make up on girls. I get so annoyed with this "friend". I don’t even bother telling her anything though. It would be a waste of time. The other day I put my status as "I hate when people think or want to change themselves. That’s how god made you why change that". Why would you want to change your self. I don’t get it. Your boyfriend, friends, family, Should love you just how you are. If they don’t then, fuck them. Why would you want somebody in your life who doesn’t appreciate you for who you are or what you look like.  I miss the old person she use to be. Oh well, everybody changes right. 


Just a message to that "friend' stop looking at your self in the car window every time you pass by one. Be yourself and take off all that make-up.

[RP] "Respect you're Elders", my ass .

I hate when adults always say " Respect Your Elders " . Really , I don't respect elders that are disrespectful towards me . If you respect me , I'll respect you . -Vincent


I agree. If you don’t respect me I'm sure not going to respect you. What the hell, why would I. Treat other's how you want to be treated. Everybody needs to be reminded of that. I hate when adults that don’t even know me and try to tell me what to do. Especially if they say it in a rude way. I don’t get how they except me to respond. For example last year in p.e. My teacher and I did NOT get along. I even told HER that she was a rude person. It seemed like it didn’t even phase her. Probably because it wasn’t the first time she heard that. If she's rude to me then I’m definitely going to be rude to her.  She would just say something in a not nice way, and she expects me to me to be all jolly about it. No. 


And to my teacher's.. I really don't give two fucks If you don’t like me or not. My grade shouldn’t go down because of that. I’m not rude to anybody who is not rude to me. So you must have done something to make me be rude towards you. I hate when teacher’s do that. I really don’t care, If I do my work I want my good grade. My grade definitely should not go down just because a teacher doesn’t like me. If I do the work then I should get the grade I deserve not because of personal problems.



[FP] My future kids .




My future kids aren’t going to be spoiled, but they are going to have what they NEED. And some extras. I know that I’m going to work hard to give them a better life then myself. I want them to have two parents but If that doesn’t happen then I would rather be the best mom AND dad. For me, it’s better to have a good life with a single parent then to have a stressful life with two parents that don’t get along. Like me. I know my mom did what's best for me and my sister, sometimes I just wish I had a dad to talk to. When my friends talk about their dads it makes me think a lot. It make’s me sad. But then I remember how much stress my mom was going through while he was around. But it also make’s me think about  how different my life would be if I had a dad.


I had a father figure, my uncle. But he passed away, so that’s even more difficult for me. I want my kids to at least have a father figure in their life if they don’t have a dad. I want my kids to have a better life then me that are for sure. I want them to be able to talk to me about anything and everything, even if there doing something bad. Like illegal. I want them to come to me. I know how hard it is not to be able to talk to your parents. I don’t want that for my kids.



[Biweekly] Steve Jobs .

I agree with Steve Jobs, you should live your life to the fullest. You never know what could happen to you. I think I live my life as if any time of the day something could happen to me. Steve Jobs will be remembered forever. Without him there wouldn't be ipods, Mac computers, itouch, iphone, ipad, etc. I thank him for making ipods. Without my ipod I'd go crazy. He invented all these electronics for us and for him to pass away is very sad. What he did for a living was all for us. He will always be remembered.

I believe in taking risk, and trying new things. Just to live your life while you can. I was shocked when I heard Steve Jobs past away. I was also thinking whose going to make the new, better, cooler electronics? I would follow Steve's advice. Not in a weird way but I always wonder what people would say or feel if anything were to happen to me. Like if I passed away. I wonder who would really care. If they would regret anything. If they could they would change the past. That's why I always try to have fun. I try not to get into any drama or anything that would later make me regret what I did. I don’t regret anything in my past. I only learn from it. That's the only thing I can do. I don’t regret my past because I believe everything happens for a reason. We just don’t know what the reason is most of the time. But still I can only learn from my mistakes.

I think everybody should live in the present. Do what you want. Be safe though and think about your actions before you do anything. Even though I get in trouble every time I have a good time, I still do it because I know I would regret. I'll regret not going somewhere or doing something with my friends.

I like how he says “Attack life, it’s going to kill you anyways” That’s so true. I really agree with that. We’re going to die anyways might as well do what you please. Do what feels right. It might turn out to be the best time ever or just a bad idea. Either way you tried it. You should also try new things. Why not try something new. I tried something new not anything crazy or bad just went to this new place. And now I love it. I go all the time. I go because that’s what makes me happy. I plan on keep going to this place too. I think everybody should do what makes them happy. You can’t count on other people to make you happy so you have to make yourself happy by doing what you like or what you love. I plan on living life how I want. I know I still have to listen to my mom and everything but I’m not going to stop doing what makes me happy.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

[FP] Feeling sad .

I tried of pretending to be happy. I’m not. I put a smile on my face because I don’t want to hear it from people. I don’t to be questioned. I don’t want people to get mad at me because I just ignore them. I hate feeling like I can’t be myself. I'd rather just keep a smile on my face so I can go through the day without any problems. That’s the kind of person I am. I would just look happy to make people happy.

I’m tired of it though. I just want to be happy. I want my family to be back to normal. I don’t want to fight with them anymore. I want to be able to go home and be happy. I want to want to be home. I want school to be easier. I want to my mom to be proud of me. I want my friends to understand me. I want my best friend back. I don’t want people to change in a bad way. I don’t want drama. I want to tell the guy I might like that I might like him. I don’t want to over think things so much. I don’t want one person to ruin my whole day. I don’t want to pretend like I’m happy; I don’t want to HAVE to put a smile on my face. I don’t want to care about somebody who doesn’t care about me. I don’t want to think about somebody who doesn’t think about me. I don’t want to give a fuck.

I just want to be happy, but who doesn’t.


[FP] Trust .


 Trust is a hard thing to gain. At least to me. I don't trust a lot of people because of my past. Being stabbed in the back from my "best friend" made me have my guard up now. I can't just meet somebody and then tell them all my business, like some. I've seen girls just meet somebody they don’t even know and start telling them all there drama and shit. I think it's stupid. There are only two people I can trust or at least think I can trust. I can trust them because they have gone or are going through the same thing as me. 

 Trust is a big thing to me. I have to be able to trust my friends to even hang out with them. Some of the friends I hang out with now I already know to not tell them my business because the wont understand or might even go run and tell somebody else. I’ve trusted so many people then found out that they really didn’t even care what I was saying to them. In the end I can’t trust people so easily. I can trust more guys then girls most of the time. Guys don’t really care so it just feels good to tell them everything then knowing that they won’t say anything to anybody. Girls will judge you. I believe that you have to earn your trust. It takes time to trust somebody. Get to know them. Get to know who they really are. If they can keep a secret or not. I hope the people I trust right now won’t stab me in the back like others have done in the past.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

[FP] Reading Minds .

If I could pick any power, I could pick mind reading. I wish I could read minds, but I would also like to be able to block out ones I don’t care about. If I could read minds I could so much like find out who my real friends are, how people really feel about me, who my friend's are and who my haters are. I can read some people just by their attitude or facial expression. What really bugs me is I can never read the people I want to read the most. For example new people, parents, and especially boys!

Usually I can get a good or bad vibe when I meet new people. I either am like aye I can get along with them, or don’t know about them yet. With my mom I can just tell when she's lying. But when she's mad I can never tell what she's thinking. It would be cool to know what she's thinking so I could say the right things to her. With boys, it’s impossible. Never can I read them, most of the time it’s because they give off confusing signals. Sometimes I can tell with other people. They way a guy looks at a girl you can just tell he's interested. With me, no. If I knew how a guy thought it would be so much easier. It might be good or it might be a bad thing. In the end its better to know. If what they’re thinking isn’t what you were expecting, at least you can move on without thinking "oh what if he really does like me" or "Maybe I’m wrong." You wouldn’t be questioning yourself. It would be so easy, but I’m not a super hero so I guess one of my wishes won’t be coming true.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

[FP] Perspectives'

I love to get a boys perspective. It helps a lot to know how they feel about girls. It's weird because deep down boys feel just like girls. Like for example, one of my close guy friends that I was getting advice from told me straight up that BOYS DONT OVER THINK, at least most of them. I get what he's saying though, girls do over think, and get there hopes up to easily. I also learned that guys don't like it when girls say that they "hate boys". It is annoying to them I guess. But I feel it. Even though I never hear guys saying they hate girls, I would get irritated too. Not all boys and girls are the same. I just don't like the way SOME boys think. I always wonder how a guy really feels though.
Getting a guys perspective helps knowing what a guy cares about and what they don't care about. I learned from my past that, you shouldn't think about a guy that doesn't think of you. Why should you be thinking about a guy if they don't even care? It’s not fair. Boys mess with you too. They think that there being "nice" but really you're just messing with our mind. I don't think that's nice I think it cocky. Cockiness is so not cute, I hate when boys think you like them just because you had a little crush on them before. But anyways my guy friends help a lot by telling me what he thinks. So far his advice has helped me not to trip over guys so much. It’s not worth it.